MDOD

Moment of Inattention

Just a few minutes. Just a call from a telemarketer. Just 5 minutes away. Just long enough for a 1 year old to die. This is truly the worst part of what I do. What can you say to the mother? What kind of fears does this dig up for me with kids at home around the same age? How can I describe what it’s like to decide to stop trying to resuscitate the child even when the heart is dead on the ultrasound, and the paramedics did CPR for 45 minutes, and the drugs were pushed, and the purplish splotches start appearing, and the eyes that don’t see anymore, and the soft, cold skin. Sometimes I hate this.

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